


The Shadows Grow

by IntrospectiveInquisitor



Category: Deltarune (Video Game), Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Body Horror, Comedy, Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified, Friendship, Gen, Gender-Neutral Kris (Deltarune), Horror, Post-Canon, Psychological Horror, References to Depression, Substance Abuse, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-21
Updated: 2018-12-21
Packaged: 2019-09-23 19:47:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17086589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IntrospectiveInquisitor/pseuds/IntrospectiveInquisitor
Summary: The four heroes reign triumphant, the Spade King is in chainsBut can it be called victory, while The Knight yet remains?After an otherworldly adventure of heroes and prophecies, Kris still longs for purpose. Fleeing fear and inadequacy in the World of Light, Kris and Susie return to the Dark World. But what they find might be exactly what they were looking for.





	The Shadows Grow

The moon was burning. The great, unblinking eye that peered between the stars gazed down upon the world. Beams of Purkinje white glinted from the vast, empty surface, adhering to every molecule, turning shadows to voids and dust to powdered silver. It pierced glass in bisecting shafts of borrowed light, painting the interior of a quiet bedroom in its watchful vigil. It spilled across the machine woven fibers of the carpet, turning all things in its path pale and spectral. The rune dyed into the carpet was not spared, starkly contrasted by tenuous webs of shadow and drained of all color.

Kris stared contemplatively into the stationary moonlight, occasionally huffing in an attempt to send motes of dust into its territory. They could not sleep. How could they be expected to, after… _everything_?

It almost felt like a dream they hadn’t quite woken up from yet, impossibilities and absurdities made truths by thinned lines between the waking world and the unconscious. Were circumstances different, they might have believed it some… delusion, or fantasy brought forth by desperate escapism. But they were not alone in the impossible.

Susie had been there, too. Susie had been there, in the dark, when the world dissolved beneath their feet and they were plunged into a second reality. Lost in a strange and lurid land, pursued by powers unknown, torn away from all things familiar--it had not begun as a happy story. But soon enough, they were no longer alone, and that single first encounter with a denizen of that odd world, the forging of a positive connection in the face of adversity, had colored every moment to follow.

As they ventured forth, growing bolder and more confident, every event snowballed further and further into perfect chaos. Kindness gave them passage, mercy gave them purpose, and understanding gave them partners. The prince from the darkness made himself an invaluable companion, the villain of the story proved nothing more than a spritely child seeking approval and love, and the countless foes standing in their way were but friends waiting to be made. Even Susie, wrapped tightly in blunt anger and lashing hostility, had been swept away by the tide, negativity eroding.

For the first time since Kris had met Susie, long-gone years ago, they could actually call her a friend.

For the first time ever, they had more than _one_ friend. Kris had never been so overwhelmed with emotion at the climax of their final battle, to see every Darkner they’d befriended along the way storming the castle to protect them from the King. They had ridden that glorious high for hours, even beyond the departure from the Dark World, and Ralsei’s heartfelt farewell. Kris had scoured every inch of their hometown for conversation, for connection, for a _continuation_ of a happiness they had thought unattainable.

But now it was over.

The sun had set on their adventure, peace restored between the worlds of light and dark. And with peace came silence. And with silence... with the dayglow of triumph and friendship waning until it was swallowed by the horizon… Kris felt empty again.

They twisted in bed, warm sheets turned coarse and sweltering as they coiled around their legs. A restlessness had taken root in their chest, the ravenous hunger of a void seeking to be filled once more. Kris had felt empty for a very long time, and nothing had ever truly chased that hollowness away. Their existence had been dull, and meaningless, but familiarity bred contentment, or at least some falsity that greatly resembled it. Now, having tasted true purpose, that numb void had become cramping and unbearable, crushing their chest inwards with terrible yearning. They… wanted it back. Kris wanted it _back_.

More than anything else, Kris wanted to feel worth something again.

But it was dark, and the world was still, and they could only wait and bear the pain before seeking out that worthiness again. Lying in bed, twisted up in the blankets and curled up in the dark, and the quiet.. it wasn’t where they wanted to be.

Fueled by impulse, Kris untangled the sheets around their legs, sliding out from under the covers and feeling the coarse carpet fibers between their bare toes. They stretched their arms over their head, sleep shirt itching against the fine hairs on their upper arms. Kris gazed around the empty room, considering Asriel’s computer for a moment before dismissing it. They’d just be overwhelmed by potential, messing around on it. Kris was tired. They needed a distraction that gave them no choices to make.

Dismissing the contents of their bedroom (video games weren’t as fun alone, and Asriel wasn’t around to push them down a hill in the cage and send them to the hospital), Kris turned the doorknob (unlocked, even though Mom had told them she respected a need for privacy) and crept out into the hallway, dimly lit by a star-shaped night light plugged into a wall socket. The wood flooring was sticky, pulling at the soles of their feet. Luckily, Mom was a deep sleeper, because Kris had never been exceptionally light on their feet.

Heading down the stairs into the kitchen, an idea took shape, and Kris recalled the pie that Mom had baked earlier in the afternoon. If Dad had taught them anything (even though it was definitely unintentional), it was the effectiveness of eating away your feelings. With a plan in place, Kris advanced purposefully into the kitchen, digging through the silverware drawer for a steak knife and a fork. Mom always admonished them for not using the pie cutter, but they figured she’d be too busy scolding them for eating half of the pie (or all of it, the night was still young) in one sitting.

The pastry protected parcel of pure sugar had been tucked away behind the half-empty milk carton, wedged in a corner where big, fluffy paws could provide a buffer to retrieve it safely, but Kris’s thin, furless fingers would struggle awkwardly with the weight of the pie. Mom was a clever woman, but Kris wouldn’t let anything come between them and unhealthy midnight bingeing.

They carefully extracted the pie, silverware clicking between their fingers with each slight movement. After minutes of hard work, the cold pie rested in their grasp, completely untouched. It glistened with hints of mouth watering raspberry filling, among whatever other candied fruits Mom had included, and their decision to bear the brunt of her scolding and helping her make another pie for church was solidified.

Kris lugged their prize into the living room, giving Chairiel a wide berth (there’d be a completely different level of hell awaiting if they stained the beloved living room chair) and setting the pie down on the couch. The TV mirrored their every move with its empty black gaze, and Kris dauntlessly approached it to kneel down and begin searching for the power cable. Sure, Mom didn’t _like_ them bingeing TV all night, but she was the one who kept paying the cable bill.

With a few minutes of cable management and fumbling for the remote, the ancient CRT came to life with a ‘thunk!’ of popping electricity. Cathode rays danced between Kris’s fingers as they brushed over the curved screen, outdated technology coming to life to depict a low-quality version of the home shopping channel. The volume was low and droning, the perfect soothing, mindless noise Kris needed to ignore the crumbling feeling just to the left of their sternum.

They sank down into the slightly-musty couch cushions, dragging the pie up onto their lap and finally, finally cutting into it with the serrated edge of the knife. The crust crumbled, and some of the filling spilled out despite having set in the fridge, but that was okay. Every bite, every hastily scarfed forkful and every minute of mindless pseudo-entertainment on the television made everything just a little bit more okay.

Kris sat in front of the murmuring television, alone and starving for something that pie couldn’t give them, until the sun came up.

\--

“Oh, Kris…” Six hours and forty one minutes after Kris had entered the living room, their mother sighed their name in concern. A deep, buzzing ache had taken root behind their eyes, and it took some effort to actually look up and blink at her. She looked as tired as they felt, even despite her neatly groomed fur. For a moment, they felt a pang of guilt for being responsible for the look on her face, but it was swallowed by the emptiness.

They glanced down at the half-empty pie tin in their lap, liberally dusted with spilled crumbs and smears of fruit filling. “Kris, dear one, you cannot keep doing this,” their mother admonished with a painful softness, “it isn’t healthy.” She reached down to take the pie tin from them, and Kris handed it over without resistance. It was just making them feel sick to look at, anyway.

They numbly awaited Mom’s sure-to-come lecture on all the ways they were a failure and a disappointment, only for silence to stretch between the two of them. Biting the bullet, Kris glanced back up at her, uncombed bangs providing a flimsy barrier. Rather than stern, she simply looked… worried.

“Kris,” she began in a tone bordering on ‘fragile’, “if… something has happened, you know you can reach out to me, do you not? .. _Did_ something happen?” The sheer worry and compassion in her voice cut right into the meat of Kris’s soul. They felt like the scum of the earth, worrying their mother with their erratic behavior.

Kris clench the flimsy leg of their pajama pants in a fist, averting their gaze to the edge of Mom’s ear so they wouldn’t have to look her in the eye. “No,” they croaked, voice a ragged tatter, “nothing happened. I just.. felt bad. Sorry.” Despite how often they did it (and how good they were at doing it), Kris hated lying. It was sour static on their tongue, the itch of a thousand scuttling legs as untruths crawled up from the basin of their throat. But they did it anyway. The truth was often too difficult to handle.

Still, it was a relief to see Mom’s concern recede. It made it easier to handle her ire, and the ‘Missus Toriel’ voice she always put on with rowdy neighbors and disobedient school children. “I’m sure you already know you’ll be helping me bake another one tonight,” she laid out sternly, and Kris didn’t dare try to resist her no-nonsense attitude. “And you won’t be eating _any_ desserts for a month. No,” she interrupted despite Kris not even opening their mouth, “that doesn’t mean a calendar month. You will wait thirty days _exactly_. Am I clear?”

Kris nodded obediently, stuffed to the gills with enough pie to have them willing to swear it off for a whole month, punishment or no. They slowly picked themself off the couch, joints stiff and aching from not moving them for nearly seven hours. Mom sighed at the sight of pie filling crusted at the corner of their mouth, licking a furry thumb and wiping it off herself. They would normally recoil, and say something about it being unnecessary as they were already going to go take a shower, but they were too tired. They just wanted to stand under the hot water, get dressed in the bare-minimum of warm clothes, and crawl back into bed-

“And you had better not be planning on going back to bed,” Mom continued, shattering their plan into powder, “you’ll ruin your sleep schedule. I have errands to run out of town, and I won’t be home until late this afternoon, so I’m trusting you to stay up until this evening.” What a disgusting notion. Kris was fully prepared to simply disregard her request and sleep until eight at night--

Then she pulled them into an unexpected hug, without any word of warning. The warmth of her fur was muted by her multiple layers, but she was still soft, and encompassing, and brimming with motherly affection. A gentle, furry hand smoothed through their messy hair, and Kris went completely still. They lightly hugged back with one arm, turning their face into her blouse to smother their guilt.

“Be good, my child. I will see you this afternoon.” She parted from the embrace before Kris began feeling overwhelmed, and offered a gentle smile before she was on her way out the door. The car outside beeped as it was unlocked, the door clunking as it was opened. The engine sputtered and growled as it came to life, and the tires dragged bits of gravel against the driveway.

Kris stood unmoving in the middle of the living room until she was gone.

\--

An hour after stepping out of the steaming hot shower and shrugging on the first outfit they pulled out, Kris dragged themself into the outside world, the cold autumn air biting at their hands and neck. The fall season was in full swing, Halloween swift approaching and all the trees bordering the town shifting through shades of gold-orange-crimson. As always, they were thankful for the compact size of their little town, small enough to walk from street to street and not bemoan their lack of transportation. There was, of course, an old scooter tucked away in the shed behind the house, but that was probably a little too small for them.

On the bright side, the cold air served to keep them awake, and the distant sounds of the town coming to life was a sufficient beacon to pursue. There was a myriad of activities Kris could while the hours away with on a sleepy Saturday, but for once they actually had something to do.

Susie was waiting for them, so they could return to the Dark World.

The apartment block wasn’t a very far walk, a couple minutes at most, and the draw of seeing all their friends again lit something that sparked and fizzled in Kris’s chest. They walked faster than they’d normally bother, walking directly down the middle of the road that only ever saw one car drive on it. They were more likely to get struck by lightning indoors than be hit by a car in Hometown.

They had only just begun turning the corner into the town proper, lost in aimless thoughts, when a voice suddenly called out their name. That wasn’t an inherently unusual thing--nearly everyone in Hometown was aggressively friendly, and it was nigh on impossible to escape the endless cycle of ‘good mornings’ and ‘quick little chats’. So hearing their name called when it was barely eight in the morning wasn’t anything new. But the person _doing_ it…

“Kris!” Susie’s gravelly yell ripped down the street, and Kris almost expected it to leave a trail of broken concrete in its wake. They glanced up, idly sweeping unkempt bangs from the field of view to take in the six foot something purple alligator (?) monster swaggering down the street towards them. Susie looked similarly unkempt, as she often did, jeans full of holes and jacket likely older than she was.

However, the look in her eyes was one Kris had only become familiar with in the last day. She looked… not happy to see them, but not pissed off or annoyed, either. It was a good look for her. It sent a pang through Kris’s soul, a pleasant ache that echoed the thing they so feverishly desired.

It was only once she’d walked all the way up to them that they remembered they should… probably greet her, but she was already talking. “Damn, you look like shit, Kris,” Susie blurted out bluntly. ..Yeah, they’d give her that. Staying up all night gorging on pie wasn’t great for one’s complexion.

“Thanks,” Kris muttered, and, without thinking, leaned closer to wrap an arm around Susie’s broad shoulders and squeeze. Susie froze at the same moment Kris did, like they’d both been dunked in an Ice E’s Freezing Pop machine.

“Uhhh…” Susie stared down at them, eyes bugging out and her upper lip curled like it was trying to peel of her face, before she converted that impulse into gently but firmly grabbing Kris by the collar of their shirt and pulling them away to end the awkward embrace. “Jeez, do you _always_ just randomly hug people like that?”

“Sorry,” Kris replied automatically, not feeling particularly sorry, but just wanting the moment to be over. “Why are you here?”

“…I was comin’ to get you, duh. ‘Bout ready to kick your door down and drag you back to the closet.”  Susie flashed a tight-lipped smirk, her posture relaxing. “So, care to explain why the big, bad boss of The Lancer Fan Fuck Fun Squad looks like a dead body?”

Kris cringed at the hideous mouthful that Susie spewed at them, taking a moment to smooth out their expression. “I told you that name is terrible. Stop torturing me with it.”

She snickered at their reaction, lips curling to reveal flashes of the razor edged teeth she was so fond of showing off. “Okay, first of all, _you’re_ the one who grabbed all the names out of the bucket, so it’s your own damn fault. And second, don’t try to change the subject. Tell me why you look like crap.”

Briefly, Kris weighed the chances of not answering against Susie tossing them into a tree. “…Couldn’t sleep,” they replied plainly, “I was thinking about the Dark World.”

“That’s it?” Susie asked incredulously, her tone not-quite-teasing. “Jeez, you’re such a wimp. Can’t even handle one all-nighter?” A deep huff of laughter left her, before the look on her face turned pensive. “..Can’t blame ‘ya, though. That stuff kept me up too. More wired than that time I licked a car battery.” As quick as it had gone, her delinquent grin was back, and it sent a tiny thrill snaking up the base of Kris’s spine. “Which is why we should go break into school, obviously.”

Well, of course that’s what they’d be doing, but… “Not yet.” Kris averted their attention towards the diner, its backside peeking through the tree line. “I’m hungry,” they lied, needing something more to plug the void inside them, for insurance purposes. Just in case… just in case going back didn’t help.

Susie blew a lock of hair out of her eyes, crossing her arms at the sort of angle that suggested she was displeased even though she clearly wasn’t. “No offense Kris, but I didn’t get up at ass crack O’clock for a breakfast date.” Before she’d even finished speaking, her stomach growled at a decibel well above the doctor recommended level, and her expression turned sheepish. ”Well.. I _guess_ we can grab a quick bite. You’re going in and getting it, though. I’m not allowed in anymore, after that time I broke the drink fountain.” Kris must have somehow made an expression without realizing it, because Susie’s turned defensive. “They say ‘unlimited refills’, but the damn thing wouldn’t give me my fourteenth cola! Not my fault it broke.”

Privately, Kris was very sure that it was absolutely her fault, but they couldn’t find the will to care. “What do you want?”

“You’re paying,” Susie immediately countered, and Kris just shrugged in acquiescence. Not like they spent their allowance on anything worthwhile anyway. There were only so many packs of marbles you could ‘accidentally’ spill when everyone was leaving a church service before it got old.

“Sweet. Get me a Rippling Beefy Boy Bicep Burger, extra Salty Fluid, and some coffee. With cream and sugar.”

“How much?” Kris asked patiently.

Susie gave them a considering look, pausing for a few moments. “…All of it?”

Kris stared directly at her without making a sound, and felt their appreciation for Susie rise by one point. Then they turned away to head for the diner, forgetting that saying ‘I’ll go get it then’ or ‘back in a sec’ probably would have been polite. Oh well. It wasn’t like _Susie_ would be a stickler for manners.

The diner had, from the looks of it, only just opened for business, considering the only employee present was the rabbit girl behind the counter, and no other customers were stinking the place up. The bell above the door jingled to announce their presence, which was painful enough even when they weren’t the sole object of attention.

“Mornin’, hun! Up awful early on a Saturday, arent’cha?” The sweet, surprised-but-pleased tone did nothing to conceal the fact that everyone in town knew Kris was a demented, uncivilized little goblin. Maybe they should barge in at two in the morning to adhere to the stereotype.

“Two burgers, two cups of coffee,” Kris replied with the bare-minimum decorum, blinking languidly underneath their curtain of hair. They could definitely feel the lack of sleep catching up with them. “Beefy Boy with extra salt, an Actually Ham, and as much cream and sugar as you are legally allowed to give me.” Kris blinked again, and either through sleep deprived hallucination or some preternatural premonition, felt the unshackled spirit of their mother looming overhead, prepared to pinch their entire head off for their rudeness. So, to appease the specter, they tacked on a “Please.”

“Sure thing, sugar! Comin’ right up! Will that be for here or to go?”

Right, like they’d waste their Saturday morning in the diner, forcing awkward small talk. The burst of euphoria that had Kris willing to speak to every denizen they crossed paths with was long gone, and they could already feel their will to socialize steaming away into vapor. They nodded towards the door, and the cashier got their message, used to a Kris who could barely muster more than five words at a time.

The wait was blessedly short, as it always was when monster magic was involved in cooking, and before too long Kris’s arms were loaded down with two take-out bags. One had a pair of wrapped burgers, buried in a pile of greasy crinkle fries, with a plastic fork and knife included. The other had a dozen creamer containers, buried in a mountain of raw sugar. It came with a plastic shovel and pickaxe, for excavation purposes.

Somehow they balanced two full to-go cups of coffee on top, glancing at the cheerfully waving cashier through the gap between the cardboard cups. A few careful hip-twists was all it took to deposit their rarely-used wallet on the countertop, the requisite dollars spilling out of its gaping maw (with tax and tip included).

“Looks like you’re all set, hun!” The spilled bills were peeled off the sticky countertop, floppy green flatworms stuffed into a rectangular metal prison. In the meantime, Kris had started repeatedly kicking the counter, the entire surface jostling. Each impact sent their wallet wobbling closer and closer, their Limited Edition Series One Holographic Misprint Mew Mew Snail Cone keychain clattering against the Limited Edition Season Three Holographic Princess Pulverizer Kyun Kyun Crusher Magnetic Charm stuck to their wallet. The cashier watched in confusion, her eyes darting between the wobbling wallet and Kris’s teetering form, kept aloft only by determination.

She had just begun hesitantly reaching out to help when the wallet reached the edge, teetering on the infinite precipice before plopping safely into one of the bags. Satisfied, Kris turned on a heel to leave. The cashier tossed a cheerful ‘Don’t be a stranger!’ that they easily ignored. Maybe that’d be an issue if their town actually had more than two places to get food.

They were buffeted by the cold wind as soon as they stepped outside, the trees rustling in an autumnal chorus that masked the sound of their footsteps. Susie was just across the street, perched on the sidewalk and playing with a flick lighter, ironically shaped like ICE-E’s sweat laden head.

“Food.” Kris watched in some amusement as Susie’s head immediately snapped up, a hungry gleam shining in her eyes. They’d finally get to watch her bite a face off, even if it was the face of clogged arteries and heart disease.

“’Bout time.” She stood up, tucked the lighter away, and marched across the street to relieve Kris of the burden of fast food. She nearly stuck her whole head in the burger bag, mechanically lifting French fries to stuff between her lips. “You got it with extra salt, right?”

Kris nodded, plopping down to sit right in the middle of the street with two coffees balance on their lap. “Give me mine,” they requested, and set Susie’s coffee down just in time to catch the burger flung at their head. Finally, the bliss of coffee and processed ham patties.

“So, wanna head over as soon as we’re done?” Susie asked, around a pulverized mouthful of burger and fries. Kris nodded, figuring that it wasn’t worth dawdling further. “It’s gonna be weird, going back after everything. It feels like forever, even though we were just there yesterday, y’know?”

Oh, they knew. Kris quieted the knot in their stomach with a particularly vicious bite. “I wonder what they’re doin’,” Susie continued, once it was clear that she’d have to hold up any kind of conversation. “Our whole adventure happened in like, eight hours, so who _knows_ what kinda crap could’a happened in the meantime. Place could be burned down by now.”

“It’s probably fine,” Kris reassured quietly, unsure if they were imagining the worry behind Susie’s exaggerating tone, “Lancer’s king now. He’s a good kid.”

“You’re probably right. Worst thing that kid can do is leave salsa in weird places.” There was a film of fondness in Susie’s tone, a layer that seemed to only surface when Lancer was involved, tinged by longing.

Kris silently echoed the sentiment. Forgoing the bag of sugar and cream that Susie had already ravaged, they drank their entire cup of steaming coffee in a single draught, and stuffed the empty cup in the burger bag to live among the fry bits and grease stains.

“Let’s go.”

Susie leaped to her feet the moment the words left Kris’s mouth, a wide grin spreading across her snout. “ _Finally_. I’m sick of all this small talk crap.” Susie crushed up all their garbage and put it in the pocket of her threadbare jacket, which was kinda gross, but at least she wasn’t littering. That was the one misdemeanor that Kris couldn’t abide.

“I figured you’d prefer breaking and entering,” Kris cracked tentatively, and was awarded with a bark of rough, rasping laughter.

“You’re damn right. Life’s too short to spend not breaking things.” Susie set off down the empty street without another moment of hesitation, and Kris idled behind her for a moment before tracing her footsteps.

Hopefully she didn’t _actually_ have a history of petty crimes.

The town slowly came to life around them as they walked, front doors clicking open and morning newspapers retrieved from driveways. Distantly, the engine of a car rumbled and gurgled, seemingly idle. Officer Undyne was likely directing traffic again.

Susie nudged Kris in the side with her elbow as they approached the next intersection, earning a curious look. “Hey, Kris, you ever see that guy before? The weirdo in front of the grocery store?” Said weirdo was, in fact, standing on the front steps of the grocer, a squat little skeleton monster that looked eight tenths of the way asleep. He wore a threadbare blue hoodie, a white crew neck with ‘I am le tired’ printed on it in comic sans font above a square image of French bread, a pair of too-large track pants, and fuzzy pink slippers.

He looked like the absolute worst kind of ironic memer, and Kris had never seen him in their life. “Must be the guy who just moved in,” they replied, vaguely recalling a moving truck driving through town the other day. Kris squinted at him, taking in his gleaming skull and too-wide smile. “He looks like a cue ball with arms and legs,” they muttered.

Susie snorted loud enough to scare a pair of birds out of a nearby tree. “He looks like a guy who collects shark-tooth necklaces from crappy gift shops,” she retorted, and Kris was barely able to choke down a laugh.

The wild comparisons of what the new guy looked like continued all the way to the school, ranging from ‘a marshmallow infused with necrotic magic’ to ‘the guy who falls asleep in a calculus lecture, but after being in the microwave for twenty minutes’. It was… nice. Kris wasn’t used to having someone they could joke around with. Not… anymore, at least.

Melancholy chose a merciful moment to descend upon them, the empty school looming in front of them with no sign of anyone having stopped by. The chances of being caught were about as low as they’d get.

“So,” Susie pontificated, gazing up at the front door of the school like it was a soda machine, ripe for tackling, “y’think stubby, yellow, and sweaty actually locks this place up?”

“She probably took the keys off her keyring to fit more keychains.” Kris stepped up beside her, glancing over their shoulder in a manner that would probably be suspicious if anyone else was in the parking lot to see it. “We should be good.”

“If you say so,” Susie mumbled, sounding vaguely disappointed. She must have _really_ wanted to tackle the doors down. Instead, she lazily swung them open with one hand, the hinges creaking as the dim, empty hallways were revealed. At least Alphys bothered to turn the lights out.

They both entered the school, Kris trying to hook their foot around the edge of the door to swing it back closed, but they just kind of stumbled. Luckily, Susie wasn’t actually looking. She was, in fact, already heading off towards the empty classroom, and Kris hurried to follow her before something vital occurred to them.

“Wait.” Their voice rang off the tiled floor, despite how not-loud it was. Susie glanced back at them… or at least, they assumed she was. They couldn’t really see her face around all the hair.

“What? You got somethin’ _more_ important to do than head back to the Dark World?” Kris couldn’t see it, but they could imagine Susie’s eyes narrowing skeptically.

They glanced away from her for a moment, towards the hallway opposite the one leading to their classroom. “I just… need to check something,” they muttered, something vulnerable creeping up their ribcage as the distance between them and the Dark World shrunk. They just… needed a little pick-me-up. Some pep in their step would calm that crushing pressure.

“Ugh. Fine, whatever. But don’t take too long! I hate standing around in the dark. Makes me feel like… a coat rack, or somethin’,” Susie growled impatiently.

Kris only nodded absently, shoes already squeaking against the tile as they headed towards Mom’s classroom. It was… unusual, seeing the familiar surroundings in a new light, or a lack thereof. The stubby hallways they’d walked a thousand times were suddenly murky and uncertain, their ends cloaked in nebulous darkness that made them appear longer than they really were.

It wasn’t anything like the all-consuming darkness they and Susie had stumbled upon before, the portal that had been _more_ than the absence of light. The darkness surrounding them now was the normal kind, the simple result of a school built with few windows. But even knowing that..

Kris quickly jiggled the handle to test if Mom had locked up or not, and the door held fast beneath their probing efforts. It wasn’t a big deal. They dug around through their wallet for a moment, pinching out a thin Ice E’s Pezza rewards card that they’d never bothered to use, and slipped it into the crack between the door and the frame. The lock came loose without much effort, revealing the empty classroom, dimly lit by what sunlight managed to drip in through the closed blinds.

They felt a pang of something sickening in the pit of their stomach as they stepped inside, but it was drowned out by a fuzzy-headed anticipation. Kris loped over to the whiteboard with clear purpose, digging through the cardboard box filled with dry erase markers. They snagged a pair at random (blueberry and… French vanilla?), ripping off the caps and cupping a hand around their nose to eagerly huff the sweet, chemical fumes.

In only a handful of instants, Kris felt it. The _rush_ soaked into their synapses, a haze of blueberry and vanilla clouding their deeply buried fears and uncertainties until the only thing left was a sticky-sweet haze of euphoria. A sigh dribbled from between their gradually upturning lips, the world twisting and spinning playfully beneath their feet. Every worry that they’d been fretfully balling up beneath their ribs suddenly seemed childish. There wasn’t a reason to worry, when the entire world was tinged with blueberry edges and vanilla swirls.

Sure, they knew it.. wasn’t a _good_ thing, that they were doing. Kris wasn’t stupid. That’s why they’d never let it become a problem. Just… a thing, for every once in a while; for when they couldn’t make it through the day. They fumbled with the marker caps for a moment, struggling to snap them back on with the fuzz stuffed into their skull. It would only last a few minutes, anyway. Just long enough to open the door and--

“HOLY SHIT--!”

Susie’s raspy cry of shock sent a bolt of panic straight through Kris’s spine, the markers clattering to the floor from the force of their full-body flinch. Adrenal fumes flushed out the weakening high in a torrent, and they nearly tripped over mom’s chair in their haste to make it out the door. Fuck, _fuck,_ what happened, what could be serious enough for her to yell like that?

The door squealed on its hinges and banged against the doorstop as Kris skidded out into the hall, sweeping the hair out of their eyes to see what was wrong--

“Creepy ass thing," Susie grunted loudly, her bulky frame only halfway blocking the thing that had, apparently, freaked her out so badly. Kris… could hardly blame her.

A life sized doll (?) of Mew Mew hung suspended from a metal pole with wheels on it (where Kris was absolutely sure a model skeleton was supposed to be, instead of an anime mascot), her giant bug eyes staring sightlessly into the darkness, and her overly vibrant and cutesy dress drooping around her like a napkin draped over a pencil.

What the hell is that?” Kris blurted, eyes wide as they hesitantly crept up behind Susie, feeling ill at ease with actually approaching the homunculus of shame.

“Teach must’a forgot to put all of her--“ Susie retched in the back of her throat, “ _toys_ away.” She turned abruptly, wearing a rictus, tooth displaying grin. “So uh, let’s hurry to the Dark World now, cuz’ she’ll probably be back to get it.”

Kris nodded rapidly, loose hair flapping up and down. They needed absolutely no further convincing.

“Also,” Susie continued as they hastily beat-feet away from the horrible polyester golem, “I’m staying there. After _that_ , I’m done with this crummy world. Hope it gets hit by a meteor.”

Kris considered that for a moment, before shrugging. Yeah, they couldn’t argue with that either.

Without any further distractions to waylay them, the space between them and the Dark World dissolved into mere feet. The shadowed hallway flanked them on either side, lockers a stoic honor guard for the blank, unassuming door at the end of the hall.

All of Kris’s earlier nerves swarmed together with new life, buzzing and stinging and swelling and popping. Their SOUL was stretched and fragile, the theoretical membrane pulled drum-tight over their churning scarlet uncertainty. They took a short breath and held it, glancing over at Susie, who seemed unable to tear her eyes away from the door. For the briefest moment, they had the near uncontrollable urge to reach for her hand and squeeze it.

“Well,” her voice broke the silence, jagged with anticipation, “no use waitin’. Let’s get in there.” Despite her words, she took a moment to actually move, hand rising hesitantly to grasp the handle. Kris sucked in a gasp, chest tightening as though a pressure valve had been turned, and clenched a fist until they could feel the crescents of pressure cutting into their palm.

Then Susie opened the door, and they stepped into true darkness.

It was exactly as they had remembered. Solid, uncompromising black that stole the very photons from the air, a yawning void that tugged at their being, yearning and suggesting. Scattered papers were the only semblance of matter that existed outside of Kris and Susie, sliding and crinkling underfoot.

“Do… we just wait?” Susie was hushed, dwarfed and insignificant in the face of the infinity closed in around them.

It was a good question. Before, nothing had happened until they tried to leave, the doors snapping shut on predatory hinges to swallow them whole. Would the same thing happen again? Or was there… a time limit, of sorts? What power kept the floor solid beneath them, instead of plummeting into the dark?

Kris turned to answer her, lips parting and teeth gently scraping together, before all the air was strangled out of their lungs. Weightlessness enveloped them, a choked gasp the only thing that left their lips as up and down were replaced by the howling wind. The darkness pressed in, eager and hungry, and panic rose up to meet it. Kris’s overworked neural pathways, buzzing from chemicals and fading adrenal fumes, opened again for raw terror. Something felt wrong, it wasn’t like before, the shadows were moving and compounding and closing in, like a being like a force like a collective, ravenous and searching and Kris was vulnerable, weakened and open and it filled every crease inside their head until they would burst like a balloon filled with meat and wet bones--

And then they fell away, and the world fell with them.  


End file.
